What’s with the s-word?

Why not? It’s fine, strong and descriptive, with a storied and ancient etymology. I use it. Since my husband died, I’ve used it a lot. I pray no heavier shit ever happens to me or my children.  And in the last couple of years, as I’ve stumbled forward without him, figuring shit out has been my calling, my challenge, my life. Shit. Yeah. I’m owning it.

7 thoughts on “What’s with the s-word?

  1. I love this Amy. I pray that me and my girls also don’t have to face any other heavy shit. Our families share some of the same losses. I’ve often thought I should write a memoir. Maybe I should do a blog instead. You are an inspiration. Thank you.

  2. Amy, love the articles in the TU. I lost my husband in July of 2012 to complications from a routine surgery and I have twin boys who are 8 now. I’m always just trying to figure shit out too. I loved your article “It isn’t really about the stuff to do”. You really hit the nail on the head. You wrote everything that I have been thinking. Sorry that you have to go through this too, but glad I’m not the only one with these feelings.

  3. Thank you Amy for this site. It’s been one year since my husband took his life. My children and I will never be the same. It made no sense then and it makes no more sense a year later. The emotional needs of my children alone is overwhelming. Let alone home maintenance, settling the estate, selling assets I don’t need, and running our family business. I’ve never been mad at him … He was obviously in so much pain but when you build a two-person life and now you are the last person standing … it’s a lot of shit. Thank God for friends, faith, funds and family but bottom line is it’s all on me. Not what I ever imagined my life at 50 to look like but it does so, like you, I’m just trying to figure shit out one day at a time.

    • Maryann, thank you. I’m so sorry that you also know the pain of losing a husband to suicide (and taking care of the kids, the house, the everyday shit that piles up), but I’m grateful for the way you reached out and shared. Bless you. We’ll both get through it.

  4. Hi Amy, I’m fortunate that my sister (T.T times union Albany) shared your site with me as I am newly dealing with a strong and true love of mine taking his own life. I still believe it could be accidental but our ties and other shit kinda force me out of the know. They know he loved me and I was a true positive in his life, but this is so new to all of us…
    I’m writing before I delve into your whole blog but I appreciate it already. I thank you, and I pray you all are fairing okay these days. With a mom like you, I imagine we/you all make it. Perhaps (as I think you’ve demonstrated) even a journey with such “s word” challenges leads to a future unimagined in the past, but SOOOOO meaningful on a larger scale or a different path for a purpose that we may never know?? Got me, but I’ll believe there’s a higher power, so… Best care/blessings to you and your family. With sincere thanks, Megan

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